When You Miss Greens

I never actually thought this day would come. In all of my years running away from squash, asparagus, and other vegetables, never did I imagine that I would be craving them.
Ok, yes, there are vegetables here, so I am not in imminent danger of scurvy. There are vegetables with dinner and lunch, and there is always a salad bar. So from afar everything looks swell. But taking a closer look, you will discover that everything seems a little to perky. First off, the green beans, broccoli, and carrots are NEVER fully cooked. Now I do like my vegetables crisp, there is a definite line between crisp and raw. I could understand having reservations about over cooking the vegetables (nobody likes them mushy, yuck!), but it would be nice to eat something that is easy to chew. I do like raw vegetables, but that is either with ranch dressing or on my salad. I want something that I can eat and feel good about eating. Starch apparently does become unappealing after awhile.
I think God, must be playing a joke on us college students, laughing at us for never appreciating vegetables when we were younger. This definitely feels like an "I told you so" moment.
Today there was some relief from my yearning. Due to the blizzard outside (which is actually warmer than when it is not snowing... weird), I decided to treat myself to grilled cheese and tomato soup. As I stood in line, something green jumped out at me from the corner of my eye. Green Beans. Beautiful, long string beans, so green and lush they exude a nostalgic feeling of the good ole' days. Ridding my head of this day dream, I turn back to watch the man prepare my food. I have fallen for that brilliant facade too many times, each of which left me feeling like I was the butt of a bad joke. As I ladled my soup, my gaze once again drifted onto those taunting beans. Studying them I realized that they were a lighter color than usual. At this my heart skipped a beat. Could it be? Were these beans cooked?! Though I was jumping up in down on the inside, I kept my composure as I deliberated my next move. Should I risk it? Was this only the light playing tricks on me and I would once again be subject to disappointment. As a rational collegiate, one would expect me to turn on my heel and not look back.
I caved. My stomach was the victor once again. Sitting down to eat was a stand-off between me and the green beans. I threatened them that I would do horrible things to them if they failed me now. I raised one to my lips, closed my eyes, and took a bite. A since of relief washed over me as I chewed on a deliciously cooked green bean. Finally, my desire for vegetables had been sated.
Now I have a few more months before I will need them again.

When 20 degrees is Considered Warm

hello everyone!
So sorry it has taken me so long to put up a post!
First of all, these three weeks have flown by so quickly, everything is still spinning. Though crew workouts do a good job of bringing everything to a halt.
I am really enjoying my courses, which include:
Chemistry 102 (continuation from last semester) 9:20-10:10am
Harmony 2 (another continuation) 10:20-11:10 am
Argentina 11:20am-12:10pm
Music History 2 (baroque period) 12:20-1:20pm
I get a great workout in between each class running up and down the hill to get to each class, because I was smart enough to schedule classes one after another that are on the opposite ends of campus. And when I say opposite sides this means vertically opposite. But it's ok, because I am really enjoying my classes and having all four of them at one time helps me stay on top of my work.
Anywho, I have got to get back to work!
Lots of Love!!!!
Palmer

p.s. I am not buried beneath the snow, the sun is actually out today. It is weird weather here...

My Wonderful Summertime Interlude

Happy New Year Everyone!
No, I am not back at school, so you may be wondering why I am writing. As you may know, I am in the beautiful country of Bolivia! And since I am here with a friend of mine from Colgate, it seemed fitting that I include my adventures from this trip in my blog. If you did not know, it happens to be summer down here. Its crazy how much I have missed the heat and sunshine. I am so glad that I have the opportunity to soak up the suns rays before I return to the dreariness of Northern winters. Well anywho, I just wanted to give y'all a heads up that I will be posting updates of my trip soon, but in the meantime there is a big, juicy piece of watermelon calling my name. Yes, you should be jealous, haha.
Love You all!
Palmer

also I plan to keep an eye out for Butch and the Kid

Rolling out of Bed onto the Stage

Hello Friends and Family!
I wanted to get y'all an update before I get swept up into exams.

I my exams start next week, so right now all of us are frantically stuffing everything we forgot back into our brains. Luckily, I don't have any papers due this week, though I do have a chemistry test friday and a harmony portfolio due tomorrow, eek! Though I only have 3 exams next week, since my freshman seminar was the basics of acting, which is nice because I have extra time to study for everything else!
Here is my exam schedule (if anybody feels like sending prayers my way, I'll need them!)
monday: legacies of the ancient world
tuesday: take-home harmony exam due by 5
wednesday: study day!
thursday: chemistry... ugh
Now just because I posted my schedule does not mean that I need reminders to study... *cough* dad, mom *cough*... :)

Oh some exciting news, yesterday I had my luncheon musicale! This is put on by the music department to display students talents in a little lunch time concert. I think the biggest incentive for people to go is the free lunch, haha. But thats fine, I enjoyed it and it was good practice. I will go into detail later and post the performance when I have time! sorry!

Now I have determined, though this just may be my southern upbringing kicking in, but I always though snow was supposed to fall down; not sideways or upwards. Should I be worried? Well for those who haven't checked the weather and laughed at my demise, it has been snowing here for 72 hours straight and is not supposed to stop until possibly saturday. Though it will probably be pushed back, since it wasn't going to snow tomorrow, but now it is. I got a call from my voice teacher this morning, who lives in syracuse, telling me that she couldn't get out of the city because of the snow. Syracuse has already had 15 inches of snow with 9-10 more on the way today. This is all caused by the lovely lake effect, though what that is I couldn't give you a good definition.
Now I love the snow!! But it stinks when I am stuck inside studying when I want to be outside playing! Everyone else is used to the snow, so they can ignore it. But this snow, which is sooooooo light an fluffy, the powder is actually a foot deep and you can't make snowballs its so loose, is way too tempting! But that's what study breaks are for!
Anyway, I hope everything is going well down south and I will see y'all in a couple of weeks!

Lots of Love!
Palmer

Video Blog

I'm trying something new today! Since I have to get cracking on my school work with exams coming up and all, I decided to make a video post so that I don't have to worry about writing everything down. I hope this works and I hope you enjoy! And please don't judge, I am not the best speaker in the world, so bear with me.
Here it goes!

not too bad, huh? Maybe I should go into the movie business... haha.

Love y'all!
Palmer

Yay Kayaking photos!

Many of you may not know this but I have had the opportunity to kayaking while I am up here. It was so nice! Besides the cold, I think I could start to like northeast paddling. Well, never as much as the southeast!
Here are some photos of me from that trip:







Lots of love!
Palmer

Frat Shirts and Boxers

For those of you worried about the title of this post, you can put the rifles back in the gun closet or under the bed, there is no yankee that "needs to be taken care".
I am simply referring to the items of clothing I am wearing curled up on my bed while writing this post.

Have you ever had any clothes that made you feel safe?
Well mine include my dad's phi delta theta shirt and a pair green, bulldog boxers.

To give you the back story, today has been a very stressful day.
~
I was supposed to register for classes next semester, and what did I not do tonight? Register for classes. You may ask, "well Palmer why didn't you?" or "why don't you register now?" Well ladies and gentlemen, what we have here is a wonderful example of miscommunication. Let's just say Colgate forgot to inform me about a fee I had not yet paid, oh and it turns out, if you have outstanding payments, you are not allowed to register. Yippee!

Now this is no one's fault but my own, so please do not think I am pointing fingers.

The whole process of registering is already stressful, but the addition of not knowing why the computer says I cannot register and having to figure out why takes a toll on a person. Luckily it seems most of my classes are still open. Only one has closed, but I have already emailed the professor explaining my dilemma and asking to meet with her. Hopefully I will be able to use my southern charm to persuade her to make an exception for me.

But if not it isn't the end of the world.
~
You can see why I needed to crawl into my worn out, comfy clothes and let the love worn in them infuse into me. If I could, I would throw on my Jackson Hole long sleeve shirt, but it isn't cold enough for that.

I promise, you can put away the shovel, nothing needs to be hidden amongst 1,000 acres of land.
When I do, I will already have my shotgun in hand when I call.

Lots of Love
Palmer

It's Cold

I really underestimated the temperature here.
Thinking back, I believe that I though that the winters would be a combination of Alabama winter temperature and snow. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahaha, wow I was really naive.
Anyway, there isn't anything I can do about it now.

So I don't know whether I have ever listed out my courses I am taking this semester. My apologies! Here it goes:

Harmony 1: music theory class at 9:20 a.m. mon, tues, weds, and fri
Chemistry 101: basic chemistry at 11:20 a.m. mon, weds, and fri
Chemistry 101 Lab: lab at 9:15 a.m. -12:15 p.m. thrusday
Legacies of the Ancient World: required history/philosophy class at 12:20 a.m. mon, tues, and fri
Basics of Acting: freshman seminar at 1:20 -2:35 tues and thurs

I really enjoy all of my classes and am so lucky to have this schedule.

Oh and I declared my major! Well, one of them. Since I know that I want to major in Music (plus free voice lessons!) I decided I might as well go ahead and declare. Declaring is basically me asking a professor in that department to be my advisor (mine is my Harmony 1 professor), mapping out a plan for the next 4 years, and then filling out paperwork. It's not binding, so I can drop it anytime I want which is nice to not have to worry about. I still need to get my paperwork turned in though... I guess that is what I will be doing today.

Sending my love from Yankee territory!!

Palmer

Lemonade Without Sugar is only Lemon Juice

(Ok so the title of this post is not the most optimistic in the world, BUT there is a surprise ending!)

This week the phrase "If life gives you lemons, make lemonade" has been on my mind. But what happens if you have all lemons, but there is no sugar to be found? I was getting very frustrated because I realized life is in control of both the lemons and the sugar.
And the only thing I could make was lemon juice.
I am not sure how this all came about but I think it was a combination of seeing my friend and roommate, Michelle and Alice, be occupied with Outdoor Ed (which I was rejected from), people in my freshman seminar talking about being in the Cabaret (rejected from), seeing posters about a cappella concerts (again rejected from), and finally being in the slow boat in crew.
After being successful in high school and knowing my place there, it is really scary having to restart and discover your niche in college. I had it all planned out, there wasn't going to be that awkward phase to adjusting. Boy was I ever wrong.
I really hated college this week, and I wanted to get out of here. God knew; I told him more times than needed. Finally on Friday, I gave up and told him that I was tired of trying to control every aspect of my life.
Well, apparently he was listening.
Last night I had a blast with my friends. There was no weight on my shoulders, I felt like I could breath. Putting my life into his hands and knowing he was in control was the most wonderful experience.
It made me realize that if try to follow my own plans, I will only find lemons, but if I let God be in control, I am sure to find the sugar.

Thank You Charles for the Wonderful Coat

Happy Halloween!!

Today is a wonderful day! It is halloween, I got to spend time with my parents and then when I didn't think it could get much better.... IT SNOWS!!! WOOHOO!!!

Here are some images of what you are missing!!








Lots of Love!
Palmer

Crazy, Leafy Days

Ok so I am really behind on my posts (woops!) and I am really sorr ok so just to give you an update, I went kayaking 2 weeks ago, its has already flurried (yes, like snow), and I am finally cleared to row again! I have been working on a post about the 1st two things but unfortunately my friend has not yet given me his photos from the trip, and I know you want photos.

But anywho, the weather has turned warm again, around the 60s and 70s, which is very nice when I don't feel like bundling up.

For some reason my teachers have decided that it is a wonderful idea to give students tests, papers, and projects due around parent's weekend. Maybe it is a ploy to show those who are paying for this lovely school, how hard we are working. That's just super! Plus, this is also when I finally get to return to crew, which takes up another 2 hours of my day, yippee!

But besides the tidal wave crashing on top of me, I have to admit, I am extremely lucky to go to such a wonderful school. Yesterday Sophie and I walked to the bookstore in between classes. Yellows, reds, and oranges enveloped us as we passed through the quaint town of Hamilton. The Victorian houses, the leaves on the ground, the fresh smell of fall perforated my hardened exterior, letting my body absorb the beauty around me. For that moment, I didn't feel the stress of school work or life. I was content and at peace.

If only those times would last forever, then maybe there wouldn't be sadness and pain in the world. But I'm not a philosopher, no do I want to be one. So I will just stick to knowing that that calm did not last, but that it is important that I find those moments throughout the day, in order for me to not go mad. And even if I do, at least it's somewhere beautiful.

Pops won fifty cents

I am disowning the crimson tide. Well, not really. Let's just say if I could put them in a time out corner so that they could think about their actions I would. But it's too painful to reminisce on the past, so I will not continue the topic of Alabama football.

Fall break was this weekend, and I was blessed enough to go home to see my family. It was a much needed visit. Being surrounded my family, animals, and friends was a refreshing break from the hectic life of college. I ended my depravation of southern culture by having chick-fil-a, sweet tea, sweet potato casserole, BBQ ribs, and a whole lot of southern drawl. Oh, I miss the south. Being home made me realize how different it is up here, not that it's a bad thing, just a different way of life. I guess I never fully understood why northerners couldn't understand us. But after living a time up here, I can see that I am from a completely foreign culture. and heck, I am proud of it!

It was funny being home; like I had never left. I went straight back into my old routines. I guess I thought that life would stop without me, so that when I returned nothing would have changed. But plenty has. Adelaide is driving (ok maybe she is a better driver than me...), Angie and Charlie live in Birmingham, and no drama at Altamont (well not as much).
And it scared me.

My Dad has pointed out to me that there is that point in our lives where you are torn between two worlds: innocence and growing older. That crossroad drives you crazy because your mind cannot make up its mind on what to do and your soul wants to be two places at once.
I am at that crossroad. I hate it. I curse it. But no matter how many times I close my eyes, clack my heels, and say "I wish I was home", nothing changes.

Sunday night my cat Shadow and I repeated our past habits of fighting over the bed. Countless times, we have sat on my bed together, me watching movies, shadow trying to chew my fingers. This has been a ritual for many years, and it never fails to cease. It is one of the few things that has been constant throughout my life, even when I and everything around me were changing. Shadow is my stability through life and a connection to everything that has happened in it. Our rite is my pair of ruby, red slippers.

SHOUT OUTS! YAY!!

I want to send a shout out to some amazing people today!

First of all to my familia living in Birmingham, who sent me a wonderful card when they celebrated Aunt Georgia's birthday!
Happy belated Birthday to you Aunt Georgia!

To Charlie Hartman: YAY!!! You're a lawyer!!! (though I'm still debating whether having another lawyer in the world is a good thing...)

To Blair Hartman: Thanks for the comment! You will now go down in history as the first person to comment on my blog!

To Dr. Angie Hartman: Congrats on your job! I hope it's going great!

To everyone who reads this blog, thanks! I love y'all so much!

As Another Door Slams, Out Jumps an Unpleasant Surprise

Ok, I'm not sure how much more rejection I can take. The real world, even though this is a microcosm of a college, sucks right now. I even told my Grandmother the other day that I wish I had been told "no" more as a child. Yet even thinking back on it, my senior year of high school was full of "no's". Maybe this rejection hurts because I assumed that college would be the opposite of my senior year of slammed doors.
What I do not understand is why each letter/email that has given me the bad news has always included something about how "this is not a reflection of your talent", to "keep up the good work", and to "try again next time".

Really? REALLY?

For some people this may be encouragement, but around the 5th time you've heard it, its just a slap in the face.
Yesterday I was walking through the Coop (which is our student union) to check my mailbox. As I was walking I was singing "wade in the water" (sorry Mom and Dad, you are not here to stop me from singing whenever I choose), and I passed one of the a cappella groups I had auditioned for. So as I am passing, one of the guys who auditioned me says, "hey you should sing with us tonight!"......
Nkele and I about to go Kung Fu whoever messes with us!

really? REALLY?!
What a wonderful combination of a compliment and punch in the gut. All I could say was, "I wish". It amazes me that they now think I am good enough to sing with them, but at the time of my audition, I was not.
Now my auditioning skills are not great, I always get nervous which makes my voice shaky. And that is all on me, no one else.
But it still sucks.
Oh and on top of all these wonderful ego-humblers, I came to an astounding conclusion today. As I mentioned before, my throat had been hurting and I may have had pink eye. Well, my throat still hurts, it woke me up at 5 a.m., and the nurse at the satellite clinic decided that I did indeed have pink eye in both eyes. Luckily my eyes are a lot better, but I am beginning to be skeptical of whether it is indeed pink eye. I had the delightful revelation this morning that I may not be suffering at all from pink eye, allergies or a cold, instead it may be what all college students love: mono.
I really think the world hates me. Oh well, I'll just have to wipe away the blood and wait to knock it's lights out. Because even if the world is against me, it has no idea that it has messed with the wrong southerner. (Me chasing Nelson Jones in Chile)

Dead Worms

One strange thing i have noticed lately, besides the leaves already changing color, is that there are an awful lot of dead worms dried up on the road or the side-walk. I first noticed them after a rainstorm, but I didn't think that a little rain would cause that many worms to flee from their homes only to be caught a rush of water and flushed to their death by sun. I know it is normal for worms to do that, but there are so many! You will be happy to know that I have not taken any photos of this occurrence, so you are spared from seeing it.

But enough of philosophical questions...

So as I have stated, I was not accepted into Outdoor Ed Staff training. BUT ITS ALL GOOD! I know that God has a plan for me, and by closing that door, he opened another: crew! It's great because I have a lot of friends rowing and I am a D1 athlete! I mean how many people (besides football players) can say they have been a D1 athlete? Plus, even though it is not kayaking, I get to be out on the water everyday. That in itself is a blessing.

I am not sure if all of you know that I am still taking voice lessons up here. I have a wonderful teacher, Neva Pilgrim, who is a dear and wonderful woman. She happens to be the reason I looked at Colgate. My voice teacher from home, Dewin Tibbs, is a friend of hers and told me that I should look at Colgate because he knew someone he that he would trust with my voice. I love Neva dearly. I am not at the point where I am in control of my voice and I must learn the artistry in singing. That can be translated into: I sound good, now for the details. Always encouraging, never overbearing, Neva is the kind of person whose faith in me boost my faith in myself. I am learning so much and enjoying every step of the way.

With all the good things here at Colgate, of course there is always a little rain cloud in the back corner. This pesky cloud happens cause illness. Yuck. Flu season is about to start and students are being to feel the first waves. I believed that because I had been sick at the beginning, it would pass over me to the next victim. Boy was I wrong. My throat began to feel sore around wednesday; fine during the day, killer at night. But as each day passed, the pain lasted longer into the day and started earlier in the evening. I went to the health center yesterday to try and nip this thing in the bud before any other symptoms appeared. My strep test came back clean, but the Nurse practitioner was sill wary. I am still befuddled by his treatment option: He said that his gut told him it was a virus and that normally it would heal on its own, but because of the way my tonsils looked he believed that I would be calling back in 2 days. SO, to prevent it from getting any worse he prescribed me some antibiotics... Hmm. I guess that he thinks that the virus will go away, but I need to get on antibiotics to prevent a bacterial infection. Since I haven't been to medical school, I'm just going to follow the doctors orders. Oh but that is only part of the stubborn rain cloud. This morning I awoke to my eyes being surrounded in gunk. I did sleep in my contacts, but this had happened yesterday too except in milder form. My eyes were red and gross. Oh crap. Pink eye. I haven't touched anything that someone else might touch and I have washed my hands so many times I may need lotion soon. Luckily the redness has gone down and nothing is coming out of my eyes at the moment. Isn't this just the icing on the cake! I guess I will be back to the health center to sooner than he expected...

Woops this meant to be posted earlier...

Sorry, it has been a while, and even now I do not have that much time.

Just a quick update:
I did not get into outdoor ed staff training (sad day!)
BUT
I am now a D1 athlete on the crew team!
Flu season is about to start... ugh, and I need to go get a flu shot (though my throat is already swollen, yikes!)
Anyway... oh great, the weather has changed once again, from sunny to rain. Why can't it make up its mind?
OH! I fixed the comment boxes so you can now post your thoughts! YAY!
Now I have to go play doctor and fix my friends finger. Razors are not fun.

Lots of Love!!!!!!!
Palmer

Aren't You Jealous?

Today, Sophie, Michelle and I went on a walk on the trails behind the school. We traversed the hiking trails and plan to explore the cross country ski trails another day. Here is a glimpse at our "backyard" (the top of the old golf course overlooking Colgate)
Awesome trees
Into The Woods
Wish you were here!

Oh and I want to send a shout out to one of my favorite people in the world and my amazing mentor Melina Coogan. If you are interested in reading some incredible writing check out her blog The Wilder Coast. Her writing is inspiring and spirit uplifting. We had a lovely chat last night after I found out she was only 30 minutes away. Unfortunately we were not able to reunite over coffee and chocolate, two of our favorite things, but it was close enough. I miss her and rarely see her. Yet each time I speak with her, I feel that we have not lost a single minute being apart.
I love you Melina!
Good luck and Bon Voyage!

Crazy Weather, Rejections, and All Sorts of Shenanigans

People warned me about the cold weather up in the north but no one ever mentioned how it never makes up its mind! In the past 15 minutes while i have been sitting on my bed, the weather has transformed from wet and gloomy to bright and sunny. And I have photos to prove it!


Anyway, the main reason I took these photos (before the weather went crazy on me) was to give you a taste of my little corner that I call home.I love being able to sit on my bed and look out the window. Its the perfect place to people watch at college. I see people hurry to class, trying not to be late, coeds flirting, guys throwing the frisbee on the quad, students lost in their music, oblivious to their surroundings. Though I am not cooped up 24 hours a day, I see why James Stewart resorted to observing his neighbors through his "Rear Window". It's fascinating watching people go about their lives. It is the perfect reality show: there are no masks or inhibitions, you are able to see the true person. In other words, if you cut out all my philosophical ranting, it's just fun.

Nothing world-shaking or mind-blowing has happened to me lately. My life has been pretty normal with school and social life. Of course there is always drama in everyday life, but it would be a waste of breath to articulate. I did audition for two a cappella groups last week. I only got a call back from one, the Dischords, who I had met last spring, and I thought it went great. But for some reason they couldn't accept me this semester. I can audition next semester for both groups, but that barely numbs the pain. My ego got in the way of reasoning and I was positive I would make one of the groups. It was part of my "Colgate plan". It goes to show that what we want is not necessarily what the big guy upstairs has in store, and we may bang our noses on a lot of closed doors before we find the open one.

Last week I applied and interviewed for the Outdoor Education Staff Training, which is a program that only takes 10-12 students a year and trains them to become staff members in the Outdoor program who lead other students of outdoor P.E. trips. It is an amazing program with wonderful people! When I visited last spring I was fortunate enough to stay with a staff member named Cal Crawford, who introduced me to the director of the program and all the other staff members. After spending time with them for only an hour or two, I knew that if I came to Colgate I wanted to be apart of that program. Yet whether I will be accepted is yet to be determined. I shoved my ego into a closet so it wouldn't get the better of my judgement, but that only makes it worse. It doesn't help that my roommate has also applied and is equally (maybe even more so) qualified to be given a position. Its a great thing we both love the outdoors, but we are both worried that they will not take one of us because we are roommates. We never planned this people!! Why would a coincidence be the determining factor on our acceptance?! AGH! I hate waiting!!!!!! deep breaths... deeeeeeep breaths..... Okay, I'm better.

But while I have been waiting I have gotten to know others who are outdoor enthusiasts. My neighbor is a NOLS alum and also a climber. This weekend he pulled out his slackline, which is a cross between a tight-rope and trampoline. In other words it is a thick rope you can walk across, and some even land flips. We were out there for a couple of hours and those curious enough would stop by to watch. Those brave enough (or stupid enough to try and impress friends) gave it a shot. I wish i had had one of these growing up, it was a blast!

"We Are Family!"

I have referred to my WA girls multiple times, the girls who I have bonded with and have become close friends with. Well, it is always nice to put a face to a name, so here they are!



I present to you, Michelle Van Veen, Palmer Miller, Kirstin Craig, and Sophie Dennis

A Crimson Gal in a Crowd of Yankee Boys

Only a southern, Alabama girl could sit in a "man cave" wearing an Alabama jersey, and cheer on the Crimson Tide. The guys here have never experienced a girl like me. Most of them were confused as to why a girl was sitting in there midst, and then even more baffled when I began cheering for the Tide. I wonder what will happen when I start yelling "rammer jammer yellow hammer..."? It doesn't hurt that The University is winning. It's a little sobering though; I am not surrounded by family or friends cheering on Javier Arenas or Mark Ingram. Instead I'm far from home, cheering on trent richardson running and julio returning. I am extremely jealous of those who are at the game!!! And these boys do not understand SEC football. Like Faulkner said, "The South. You can't understand it. You'd have to be born there." Sooooooooooooo true. I never saw the truth in that statement until moving up here. But anyway, I'm having a good time. I have the biggest smile on my face! ROLL TIDE ROLL!!!!!!!!!!!!